Monday, February 13, 2012

Choices

 And so, I get poignant.

 I've been hesitant to get too deep in my writing, because when I get deep, I admit too much. Last time I did that, a former co-worker called me because my former boss's girlfriend had read this blog and unnecessarily gotten mad at someone. It's no fun to go to the source, is it?

 I've been thinking about life's choices lately. The good, the bad, the sucky. I don't always make the best choices in life due to external factors and other times, I'm right on the money. I guess that's life though.

 I mean, I should count myself lucky that I've come as far as I have. My career is on the right track. I'm not dead.... All good stuff! :) There's a ways to go yet, but right now, I'm doing decently. Good choices make life worth living.

 I've made choices through the years though to be miserable. I've been afraid to move on in life in many respects. I've been afraid to move on job wise at some points, I've been afraid to move on relationship wise sometimes, I've been afraid to just be at some points. Do we all go through that at some point, or is it just me?

 Why do we make these bad choices in life though? For me, it's fear. I'm too fat. I have a pimple. They'll think I'm stupid. And on and on.... That has really held me back in a lot of respects! That has taken years off my life!

 That sucks!

 I'm angry with fear! I'm angry that it has helped me make these awful choices!

 I've recently been making choices though to jump in the deep end without a life jacket on, and it has been a magnificent experience. You take the risk to freeze your ass off when you have everything to gain and nothing to lose. The cold pales in comparison to the overwhelming exhilaration of the experience. And that is awesome.

 And that is how life, in a lot of respects, should be lived. I'm not saying to throw caution to the wind. I'm saying live.

 Live your life with gusto but think of tomorrow and the choices you need to make to have it be positive and life affirming.

 Live-and make it be all it can be.

 You'll thank me later. Trust me.

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