Wednesday, October 31, 2012

When you know it's time

 These past few days have been filled with God's presence leading and guiding me, telling me it's time to move on from certain things.

 No bones about it, last year was awesome. It was a good year. And then, 2012 rolled around and has been filled with health issues and other crap. Only now am I beginning to see the light-and it's telling me that I need to move on. From people. I see the light with them and know it's time to distance myself. I really feel that God's blessings won't come into my life unless I do this.

 I guess I want to hang on to the good feeling I had 12 months ago. Time marches on though. Better things come along. I need to release the past to find the present blessings.

 Here's to working on dumping the past to find present blessings. Here's to living in the present. 

Saturday, October 27, 2012


 I'm happy to report that I just looked at my blood test results online and see that everything came out normal! Yippeee!

 I hope this isn't too TMI, but I love taking Bromocriptine only because my facial hair is going away. I'm not kidding! I know that women with PCOS get facial hair, but the endocrinologist looked at my blood work  at my last visit and said in no way do I have it. Plus, he added that I wouldn't get a regular period each month  if I had PCOS. He strongly feels the facial hair is caused by the prolactinoma.

 It's good to see a light at the end of the tunnel-6 months later... I see the breast surgeon once every 6 months now and will be happy to get to that point with the endocrinologist. I know at the least I'll have to see him that often to get the thyroid ultrasounds.

 In other news, my birthday's coming! I'll be going out to dinner tomorrow night with my parents and will do something Monday too. My boss gave me the day off on my actual birthday. Love her. :)

 And now, it's time to do something with my pumpkin. 'Scuse me....

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

I guess I have a good case of anxiety...

 So I get to the endocrinologist's yesterday and explain to him the whole cancer scare 2 years ago. I apparently wouldn't be walking around right now if it were cancer. Go figure...

 And I'm not getting a thyroid biopsy at this time. The nodules pretty much haven't grown in 2 years and aren't even big enough yet to biopsy. I'll have another ultrasound in a few months and will repeat them every 6 months.

 So, it looks as if I just have a pituitary gland tumor.

 And a good case of anxiety also.... 

Saturday, October 13, 2012

Now that I've calmed down....

 A friend who's a chiropractor explained thyroid goiters to me and how 99.9 percent of the time are usually benign. I will, of course, go into detail with the endocrinologist about my cancer scare, because as my friend put it, will be useless to do a thyroid biopsy if this (heaven forbid) is the "c" word.

 I just can't believe I'm thinking about this again 2 years later. I thought it was over and done with. Guess not!  

 I just want this to be done once and for all and to be the picture of health that never, ever thinks about this again. 

Thursday, October 11, 2012


 So I got the thyroid uptake and scan results emailed to me. Guess who needs a thyroid biopsy?

 This all goes back 2 years ago. I had a cancer scare that all stemmed from a lump in my back. My primary doctor wasn't concerned but sent me on to a general surgeon to have it removed. The general surgeon was concerned though and had me do a CT-scan. The results came back a day later as possibly liposarcoma that had spread to my chest wall, lungs, a lymph node, thyroid and spleen.

 My primary doctor called his oncologist friend whom I saw and said no, this was probably lymphoma. He'd need a biopsy to be proven correct though. All 3 doctors agreed about the possibility and so, I had a biopsy done of the lymph node. Benign!

 Further testing was done by the general surgeon, which he said was fine-including my thyroid. The surgeon told me I had a goiter and then added in, "not much you can do about that."

 Oh, there's a LOT you can do about that, dumb ass! The endocrinologist thinks so too, obviously! I swear, God forbid, if I have the "c" word, I'll be pissed!

 I'm just mad! 

Monday, October 8, 2012


 I'm tired this evening. Aw hell, this weekend was tiring. Which is good.

 I practically spent the weekend  at church. Women's Conference was Friday and Saturday. I took a nap after church on Sunday. Here I sit after work at 7:40 p.m., ready to zonk out again.

 It's good to have active weekends like this. It's just sucky to feel like I want to sleep again with it not even being 8 p.m. yet. I know it's probably related to my insulin level though. Booo!!! :( (I felt like eating a muffin after work, which probably did me in.) Then again, it could be my thyroid. I'll be having a radioactive scan tomorrow morning to see whether I need a biopsy or not. (I hope not.) I hear thyroid issues can make you tired also.

 Oh, and for those of you wondering, I lost 3 pounds. :)

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Sick of it

 It's no secret that I've seen more registered dietitians in my life than anyone should for my weight problem. All of them have said the same thing to me-are you sick of being overweight? If you're not sick of it, you won't change.

 I got to thinking about the truth of that statement recently. Am I sick of being heavy? Yes. How sick of it?

-Am I sick of it enough to limit the unhealthy stuff that I eat way too much of?

-Am I sick of it enough to actually exercise cosistently?

-Am I sick of it enough to stick with it when my motivation runs thin after a month?

 I'm getting there. :)

 And in case any of you were wondering, it was a decent week weight loss wise for me. :)

Monday, October 1, 2012

You would've thought the flood was coming....

 You would have thought the flood was coming or something when stepping inside church yesterday! They built an ark! The sermon yesterday was about Noah, and I have to give the pastor and staff an A for creativity for helping us visualize the ark! 

 This was cute. The ark was built right by the baptismal area so that when Noah spoke (with live animals in cages all around him), you thought he was standing on the top of the ark. :) He was telling the pastor right then that he was waiting for his final delivery of animals. :)

 These didn't download in the right order. Outside was a petting zoo-including camels....

  And crocodiles....

 Noah getting his final delivery. :) They walked right into the ark.

 The pastor speaking. This ark was built by volunteers at the church. They did a great job!

 And another view of the ark. Very impressive. I wonder what they did with the ark when they were done?

September 2012 recap

 September was a really hot month and also good in some respects too.

 The month started out having the endocrinologist put me on Bromocriptine. All I can say is WOW! What a great invention! This medication increases the amount of dopamine in your system, which is probably why I feel so great. I have to get a thyroid scan in a week, so we'll see how much longer I'm on this stuff if my thyroid is causing this.

 I also did my final summer "staycation" outing. I went to LA County Arboretum. I was there last for a grade school field trip, so I wanted to go again-and it was damn hot. OMG. I'm pretty proud of how I spent the summer this year and hope to do this again next year.

 The space shuttle also made its final flight over Southern California. One of its last flights was over Disneyland, which is one city away from me.  So, I drove over to Anaheim, parked on a residential street and watched the shuttle with the 10,000 other people also there that day. It was neat! I was glad to make the trek. (I later learned I didn't need to do that and could see it from home. Dang it!)

 Reality is going to hit this month. May it be weatherable.